I am often instructed that friends are the family you make. Though this is true I always feel like reminding the instructor that relationships you build with friends are based on the building skills you learned with your family. Most of the time I don’t bother. I am resolved to work with what I have rather than what could have been and isn’t that an ideal wo
rkplace for all of us. I have good friends, though I may not be the best person at being friends, and I love my life, though I can say love can be difficult. I can say I have fought to be the man I am though fighting is about knowing when not to. I write not for affirmation nor confirmation but fundamentally tt’s firmation. I was here now. I tweet and I update on facebook and it’s neither heavy nor light. It is what it is, as am I. I is what I is and that’s what time it is.
I’m by no means saying blogs replace family. I am not saying saying kill your family and blog. Blogging is certainly not therapy. Mine may have spelling mistique or grammatical terror at 
some points. For that I’m sorry. I’m not precious about it – call it what you want – but it is precious to me. When I say writing means the world to me I mean writing means the world to me. These four blogs should’ve been three don’t cha think this was one too far. Cheers to you and yours.
Photos: Top Karachi 2013, Middle Unite Union Refugee Workers London 2013 Last Friends and artists Melville South Africa 2012.
here is part one then part two then part three and then this one part four.
You blog, we read, we respond, or not…Fact is it’s always fresh and yes, a bit like squash! You (we) never know quite what angle it’s gonna be coming from, there’s an urgency and a depth of thought along with the sense of play, all of which is pretty rare “these days”.
Thanks Rhiannon.
Great Post! I met you at the UBud writer’s festival in Bali, Indonesia (my first introduction to SLAM poetry). I stumbled across your blog on Jon Doust’s page and have enjoyed your sentiments about writing! Keep up the great work – I’ll keep reading! My favorite line from your post – “Blogging is certainly not therapy. Mine may have spelling mistakes and it may be grammatically offensive at some points but as a man my metaphorical grammar is challenged and my spelling mistakes are many” – it reminds me to WRITE and that is doesn’t have to be perfect!
Cheers, Brandi J. Waits
Hey Brandi, Thankyou. You’ve reminded me to get in touch with John. Thankyou. I lost what you quoted in an edit of the blog so you know what? I’ll put it back in. Or else I’ll leave it in your comment as a gift for whoever reads the comments.
Dear Lemn
I have just caught up with the documentary about your visit to Ethiopa to find out about your father and thought of this poem which my son read at his grandfather’s funeral, which you may know. the way your family responded to you reminded me of it and it may strike a chord. I loved the film, no dry eyes here.
Heredity
I am the family face;
Flesh perishes, I live on,
Projecting trait and trace
Through time to times anon,
And leaping from place to place
Over oblivion.
The years-heired feature that can
In curve and voice and eye
Despise the human span
Of durance — that is I;
The eternal thing in man,
That heeds no call to die
Thomas Hardy
Thanks xx
Hey Lemn,
Lovely series of posts. Here is my response…
https://yemisi-blake.squarespace.com/blog1/2013/4/1/why-im-back-blogging
It takes great courage and confidence to blog openly for whatever reason leaving yourself open to judgement and ridicule, I give you great credit for that especially with your past life. I blog privately, I write for myself, and like you say every word proves to me I exist, I am still alive. The day the words cease to appear is the day I cease to breathe. Family used to mean to me your blood relatives you shared a life and history with, people who should provide certains things like love and loyalty. This was so as a child I gave and received this, but as years passed things changed. People passed away, marital relationships broke down. The blood relatives showed their true colours. No loyalty or love was on offer just betrayal and harm. I am not talking about the normal family arguements and disputes people engage in, I am talking about serious, detrimental, life harming actions that I had to remove myself from to survive. I created my own ‘family’ from people who need and offer love and loyalty, who accept you for what you are, the same blood does not run through our veins but the same love does. So to people who make the statement “but your not ‘real’ family”, I say no thank god.
X Thanks