Day one of two  is my first day off since  forever ?    It could have been the roaring log fire in  reception  and the  luxurious aroma  of wood smoke but
 I guess it was the heated swimming pool,   the eucalyptus steam bath
followed by the sauna that swung the hotel in favour.  The rest of the day  I spent
 walking  the historic turreted town of Lancaster  in a fog of contentment.   

In early evening   I caught North West tonight and Granada reports that further polarised a misty eyed nostalgia for Lancashire.   A  “local story” is national news today no doubt the respective news teams will be happy.  On the edge of the lake district I watched sunset  by the outdoor  hot tub  over the rolling hills of clough that surround Lancaster.   I spend the evening on  relearning my lines with the assistant director.

Day two  The hotel is ten minutes walk from  Nuffield Theatre where I am stood backstage as the audience pour in. My one person show  Why I Don’t Hate White People is about to begin.  The travelling  team are the lighting technician, a stage
manager and an assistant director.  It’s an enjoyable performance and ninety percent stay  for an electric   Question and Answer.

Exhausted I  return to the stage after the applause and sat on stage for the beginning of the question time when a small woman of about sixty came and  hugged me.     “My son” she said “Who I searched for because of you.  Remember him?”.  I nodded in the affirmative.  .    Those moments after finishing a performance I’m open.  The body and heart and brain seem to be in the process of recollecting  themselves. It’s a vulnerable state.  “he killed himself a month ago”   she said. 

She  came to one of my readings about twenty years ago and realised she was in the same mother and baby home as my own mother for whom I was searching.  Subsequently she searched and found her adopted son.  Subsequently I  interviewed her   when making a BBC documentary about my own search.  I’d received the occasional message over the years about her newfound son .  Apparently he wanted to meet me.  She sat back down and the Question and  answer session began.