Thanks for your advice to cold rental seas. It helped  kick start me to action. My circumstances are the same but I’m standing with eyes open  rather than bowed with eyes closed. I’m  still looking for an apartment but you’ve helped me. As a result of your advice  I’ve reached out to friends. How invisible they are when one refuses to see. And the added advantage of opening my eyes is that the light gets in and I don’t walk into walls.