I’m tired.I have won my case against Wigan Council and I should be happy but I am just tired. I have been awarded a six figure sum. I will receive a written apology and my files will be returned to me sans redactions. Believe it or not there’s a lot of goodwill between Wigan Council and me. One day there’ll be a Christmas Dinner for Care Leavers in Wigan.I should be throwing a party for my “win” but I won’t. This case has lasted over three years and a lifetime. It has tested me to the core, as it should’ve. But I want you to know this: If you were one of the 380 people sat in the audience for two hours at The Royal Court Theatre listening to my Psychologists Report as read by Julie Hesmondhalgh then you will have heard it all.
As my story unfolded through the lense of the psychologist you will have heard the shocking effect that all this had. But you will also have heard of my treatment of some women over fifty years. It was all in The Report. I have been making amends on this matter for some years and will continue to. The amends are actions of significance.
We boys and men can be messed up for all kinds of reasons. Some of us (men) use alcohol to disguise our behavior from ourselves. Male trauma can reflect directly and negatively on the women who have the misfortune to have passed through our lives. None of them deserve that misfortune. Blaming alcohol or a broken past doesn’t cut it.
It was a woman who came to The Royal Court Theatre who described The Report to me as “radical vulnerability”. It is women who have helped me through my life. Women support both my lawyer and barrister. It is a woman who carried me. If anyone practices radical vulnerability it isn’t me hearing my psychologists report at the royal court theatre it is women, every day of their lives.
Photographs: top: Julie Hesmondhalgh and I on stage at the Royal Court. Second photo: Subrina Kidd and I at my birthday party in Manchester. Third photo: My friend Becky Swift at TLC (The Literary Consultancy.) Fourth photo My mother in the “long jump” on her school sports day in the 1960’s Ethiopia